As of recent, you have become more and more disappointing. In fact, now you are downright boring. Why all of the sudden have you tried become someone else, like that whore myspace? What purpose do these applications serve in our open relationship?
In high school, I had a myspace. However, myspace turned into crapspace when everything turned customizable, and people who didn’t have an inkling of html knowledge were able to do it with things like “pimp my myspace.”
Facebook, you grew on me more and more, with your simple and elegant design, and your pages loaded so fast it gave me chills. How could something so simple be so perfect. You cared about me a lot, being able to store many pictures. Sometimes you would poke me.
Things were going great. We were becoming more and more in love with each other. Then you started to show your true colors. You became angrier, maybe as your started to accept more lovers (why must anyone be able to date you, and not just college students.) This is when things started to get hairy.
Then you started to become that jealous girlfriend, stalking every one else and providing information to everyone (based on the news feed, a major source of controversy.) You wanted me to know about everyone elses lives, and you were spreading rumors about me to people’s home pages.
The final straw has happened, which is the inclusion of applications. There is no room left for me in your life. You just want more and more. I think you might have been a gold digger, just trying to make your 8 million dollars a month on advertising. Why must I receive information about your other lovers? Why do you alert me when they add an application? Why do you invite me to other people’s applications?
I don’t care who nominated me for cutest, facebook. All I know is now it looks like we aren’t ever going to be ‘cutest couple’, because I am breaking up with you.